Spiritual Food

When I met the Lord for the first time, I was 17 years old. The rehab I was in had a Bible school that I attended each weekday. The only thing I can remember from that school was a few memory verses that I still have hidden away in my memory and the story of Christ’s life. I learned a lot of other things, but none of it stuck. I remember coming to class with other books hidden away and not finishing my work in time because I felt it was very stiff and pointless.

As I take on the servant heart of Christ I try to remember that He is different for everyone. This weekend some of us are heading out to a park that the homeless frequent. As much as I want to share Christ in the language I have become accustome to using, I must remember the basics of Him. He is different for everyone. I remember very clearly what it’s like to be in the down and out desperate situation, long after meeting Christ. Even if these men and women met our Lord at one time or another, I can’t come at them with the heavy teaching I’ve been given. Only the Christ that is in me, is what I have to give. If I can share Christ without using one scripture or daily declaration(something our church is doing), even better.

I was angry most of my time away from the Lord. So was everyone I spent my time with, did my dealings and business with, and met at the hospitals I was in. That’s the one attribute that is being brought to mind over and over again. when Christ was brought to me in the spiritual form, rather than the natural, practical form, that was something I could take hold of. I remember one time specifically sitting on a beach in Daytona and coming off of some drug. I may have been just waking up there on the sand. I’m a little fuzzy on the details. Anyway, these two Christian girls walked up to me and quoted John 3:16(which happened to be one of the verses I had memorized at the Home years earlier; and they had gotten it wrong, but I didn’t correct them). They told be about Jesus and church, and light and salt. They were precious young women and I loved their hearts, but what they gave me didn’t help, if anything it angered me. I just wanted to “get real” with someone. I got it clearly… I was a child of God. But at that moment I was a desperate person maybe sitting in her own vomit. It would have been nice to talk about something that could actually help me at that moment. Be my friend. Tell me it will get better and one day those verses and Bible talk will be what I want to talk about.

Almost two years ago I was just beginning my journey into organic church. Most of the deep spiritual talk is something that has taken my Spirit almost two years to understand. I believe there is a time and a place for everything, baby food and solid food. Sometimes we are led to use words and Scripture to share Christ. Sometimes we are to just be there and not try to teach them anything. When I was in my lowest spots, I couldn’t accept any teaching… even one as simple as I am a child of God. That comes later. What I could accept was someone being nice to me with no agenda or teaching to go along with it. I have so much good stuff that I know will help these homeless people one day, but this is not the time for what I want them to know or what I think will help them. This is the time for baby food.

Thanks for reading and have a wonderful Thursday!

Love,

Jackie

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