Last year was extraordinary. I am still basking in the wake of Christ’s glory revealed and all His life that flowed through me, like water through the vine. I was going to list the things that have changed, but it all came down to one giant mountain of a revelation… it is better to sacrifice, die, and that means sometimes being wrong, than it is to be right.
The wisdom of Christ asks of us to say His words, hold out His hands, and to desire what He desires. Hefty, especially when it makes the Church, a family, or just plain old me, unpopular. There were times this year that I had been so consumed with getting others to see what I saw, which is naturally always right (just joking guys), that I had abandoned the nature of Christ, who urges me to let go of trying to make anything happen. Be okay with being wrong, He says to me. Sometimes doing what I think is the wrong thing, is actually the right thing.
There were times this year that were so painful I thought I might not make it. I didn’t understand why the world was working the way it did. And then I realized that I expected results that just weren’t meant to play out. And that’s how it was supposed to be. I needed to be okay with being wrong. This year the Lord asked things of me and I did what I could with the Life that is given to me. And He knew before I even lived it that I was going to be put in a position where I needed to lose. I needed to be okay with saying/doing/expressing the unpopular thing and I needed to lose gracefully. It all happens so that more of Him can be revealed on earth.
Christ isn’t concerned with being the best, or with being right. Ironic since He’s perfect, but He truly just wants to love and to be loved. He wants to be expressed by willing souls that are empty to all but Him. I need to be okay with being wrong, with being misunderstood, and with sacrifice. Death is the ultimate act of wrong-ness. Before we die physically, Christians die a supernatural death unto Him. We are raised with our Lord. But the death that happens on a daily basis doesn’t only happen when we are wrong and need to admit defeat. It happens when we are right too. I can’t make anyone do or be something, not my kids, my friends, or anyone else.
In 2013, our family will be more of a unit and less of a separated, us and them-type dynamic. I take a cue from Christians who have been extremely wise, yet humble as can be. I watched one of the wisest men I know get obnoxiously yapped at by an immature and unstable (we’re all unstable, but this one was more than most) Christian, in public, and still maintain the love and patience of Christ. He was most definitely right in the scenario, but willing to be wrong if it helped this loose cannon calm down and see more of Christ. I think of that often because I saw so much of the Lord. And I am sure so many Christians saw the Lord in this person.
I saw change happen this year. I saw that I have a piece of the Lord in me that may not look like anyone else’s, but is still the fullness of the Lord. Growth came out of loneliness. Love and patience came after nastiness and ignorance. I learned that just because a loud person says something loudly, doesn’t make it correct. I learned that being quiet doesn’t mean I don’t have anything of Christ to share. I learned that I am a work in progress because I am still in human form, but I am also complete in Christ. Leaning too far towards one way or the other will cause inclusiveness (like when a church doesn’t give a hungry man food because they don’t think he deserves it, yet they are completely comfortable asking and getting help for themselves) or will cause works-based faith (like striving for righteousness instead of living by Christ’s life). I don’t regret sharing my heart this year. I won’t ever stop. I learned that there are very kind, loving, Christ centered free thinkers out there and then there are those who will get there one day and I am to love them all the same. I have found that people are going to be wrong, and I need to let them be right.
Thank you Lord, my life is in You.
Happy New Year!