Forgiveness is confusing, is it an emotion? A verb, such as an action? Maybe forgiveness is ongoing or a one-time thing. That’s the difference between people. Some forgive instantly, some don’t want to forgive until punishment, verbal or worse, is given.
I think that when I judge another or choose to take control over their feelings, it shows my lack of understanding about myself. How can I, one of the worst sinners I know, ever take the place of God? You see, every time we get angry at another and go to them instead of God in our anger, we are taking His place. And to be honest, most times, to confront a friend is useless because he or she already know just how wrong they’ve been. And we’ve all been wrong. It seems like those who have been forgiven the most, sometimes of the most heinous acts, tend to be the most confrontational of another’s faults. We can see other’s wrongdoing’s so clearly, but our own are merely little mistakes that can be excused.
It takes some real nerve to act as if we have authority over how another should feel. When the Lord reveals the pieces of my heart which have remain hidden from Him and I can see the ugliness that’s been building in the corner, as painful as it feels, He allows it to come out so it can be released. He has washed us clean and there’s no need to hold onto guilt, shame, and the mistakes I’ve made. And I can’t ever fix my own problems. I need the Lord to do it & show me what’s really going on. Because I am a master at hiding my real feelings behind false ones.
A wise man, actually several wise men, have said that when we see faults in others we are revealing what’s in our own heart. Isn’t it heartbreaking to always be the one in the wrong? It feels horrible. Some are better at forgiving themselves and moving on a lot quicker, but it doesn’t mean they are better than the ones who take time to forgive themselves. The ones in my life who have forgiven themselves of sins, massive and small, can be hard on me about mine. Being hard on people has never made them feel better about who they are. Just a little piece of advice for any blogger who may have stumbled upon my post. I am struggling this morning with feeling bad about something I am in the process of making right. I was reminded of my mistake and the faults of another’s heart were placed on my own. If I were to be a scorekeeper I could win in my current situation. But that’s not what the Lord wants of us. When my faults are poured onto me, it’s no time to begin losing control and getting angry. Just like I am still growing and maturing in my areas, others are still growing and maturing in the area of plucking splinters out of my eyes while looking past the logs in their own.
I am hurting this morning. I was feeling pretty good about what I thought were smart decisions and a wise plan. But I was told how awful it was and now I feel like crap about myself. And once that train gets rolling, everything I’ve ever done wrong begins to invade my thoughts and I don’t want to leave my room. The days of treating others how you want to be treated are not over, but the days of expecting others to do the same are gone. Some get to excuse themselves and some get to feel like crap.
Nobody ever became a Christian because they lost an argument. Just like an adult doesn’t shine and better themselves by being put down. Taking on the armor of Christ, I’ll side with Him every time. He is closer than a brother and bigger than my problems, of which I have many. I hope this goes away soon.
Have a good one guys, and screw anyone who puts you down today, they aren’t worth the sorrow.